I’m a Chicago-based writer and stand-up comedian interested in whales, Southwest Michigan, flirting, classical music, astrology, where you buy nice candles, and the film, Force Majeure.

I perform stand-up in and around the city of Chicago and the midwest at large. Chicago Magazine recently named me the Best Rising Comic in 2016, which, thank you and also wow.

I’m an Associate Video Director at The Onion. Please do not email me at my personal email address with regards to anything Onion-related.

email // franhoepfner [at] gmail [dot] com
twitter // franhoepfner
instagram // franhoepfner

selected portfolio

The AV Club
You’re The Worst is TV’s most accurate depiction of 21st century dating (September 2015)
Zac Efron is a character actor—he just doesn’t know it yet (September 2015)
Kitchen Confidential is a recipe for ensemble casting at its finest (January 2015)

The Awl
> Fun To Hate (June 2016)
> McDonald’s Is The Only Restaurant That Should Be In Airports (September 2016)
> Classical Music Hour with Fran (weekly column)

Bright Wall/Dark Room
> Now Playing: Hell Or High Water (September 2016)
FAQ About The Best Movie Of 2015: on Magic Mike XXL (December 2015)
The Thing About Ghent: on Film Fest Gent/Force Majeure (December 2014)
Cruelty and Splendor, Chaos, Balance (Or: It Gets Worse): on Carnage (October 2013)

Brooklyn Magazine
Absolutely No One Is Fucking In Brooklyn (May 2016)
> Here’s 50 Flirts, co-written with Aubrey Bellamy (February 2016)
Modern Like (January 2016)

> How Do You Stay Somewhere Forever? (March 2016)

What I Learned From Putting All of My Crushes Into a Secret Facebook Group (December 2015)

I Can Water My Virtual Plants, But Not Myself (January 2016)

> The Lonely Island Is Take-Proof, Stupid, And Perfect (March 2016)
My Spotify Discover Weekly Playlist Thinks I Am A Garbage Person (January 2016)
> Chicago Is Just as Cold and Horny and Boringly Comfortable as Easy Makes It Look (September 2016)

The Kind
Ansel Elgort Is Pretty Good (January 2016)
Elevated Cinema: The Revenant (January 2016)
The 4:20 Text: A Tether Of Friendship (November 2015)
Elevated Cinema: No Country For Old Men (November 2015)

Why Veep Is The Best Comedy Since Arrested Development (June 2015)

On being ugly (December 2015)

MEL Magazine
> The New Season of ‘Black Mirror’ Suggests Technology Might Actually Be Bad (October 2016)

Screener TV
> ‘Chef’s Table’ is the exact opposite of must-see TV, but you still have to watch (October 2016)

@FranHoepfner on Tombstones and Taking Her Time to Write Jokes (July 2015)